I know I had said I wasn't going to blog on such a regular schedule, but I did not intend to abandon my blog for this long. You could say I've been feeling a little unmotivated as of late. I'm not sure what has come over me the last couple weeks - well other than a lack of motivation. Life is becoming a little challenging at times, and I am not progressing in my life here the way I had hoped. I have very high expectations of myself and when those are not met, I have a hard time excepting the truth. I kind of give up or get down when things aren't going real well. It is hard for me to deal with these times, I think, becasue 9 times out of 10 in my life things have gone really well. Everything from academics, sports, moving, jobs, or life changes - I typically handle, adjust, and succeed.
Some things are not coming to me as easily as I had hoped - mainly language. Since language is the basis for any social or academic progression - all of that has pretty much halted as well. I felt a real progression for like the first maybe 6 weeks that I was living here, but now, these last six weeks have pretty much felt like a stand still. I admit that this is mostly my own fault. Due to some frustration and absolute boredom with trying to study on my own, I have made absolutely no efforts to study and push myself. I have reached a point in my abilities where I can communicate and make out what is being asked of me. However, this is on a very basic level of communication. When it comes to social matters, local lingo, talking in groups, or understanding when someone isn't speaking directly and clearly - I am pretty much lost. This inability to just catch on once I knew the vocab is very frustrating. As I said before, I had high expectation and thought I would just start to pick things up and be speaking like a regular Peruvian. It has only been 3 months, and I realize these expectations are crazy; however, part of me though maybe it was possible. At long last, I don't have the patience to just wait around until I eventually start to speak better. (this could take like a year!) I have decided that one of the biggest benefits I will receive out of living in Peru is becoming somewhat fluent in another language. This will undoubtedly be a big help in my future and open many possibilities for future jobs. Not to mention that I no longer want to be that "American" that only speaks "American". (and yes I meant to say speaks American instead of speaks English) This weekend I began my search for a language school that teaches Spanish. Surprisingly, there are a ton of schools that offer spanish language classes to expats living in Peru. The problem lies in the schedule of this classes. Most schools are targetting full time students and offering a full language immersion. (this means between 4 - 8 hours of class everyday during the day) There are a couple schools that offer alternative class options that only require one class a day, but these classes are only offered during the hours that I am working. At long last I found two schools that have possible schedules that may work for me. One school offered a four hour class every Saturday, so I called to inquire. It turns out that even though they advertise this class, it only becomes available when enough interest arises to put a class together - currently I am the only one interested. Alas, I found one school that offers a night class - Monday - Wednesday - Friday - from 6-8pm. This could potential be a very good option. I need to talk to my boss and possibly renegotiate my hours/wages to make room for this class. I typically work until 6:30pm currently - I would have to probably leave work by 5:15 in order to get to my class on time. Also, this school happens to be apparently the best language school in Lima; therefore, the most expensive. Time will tell, but I hope in the near future I will be enrolled! Wow - this is probably really boring for someone to read. I apologize, but it is what is weighing heavy on my mind currently. Fixing the language issue is really the first step for me to expand my horizons and fully enjoy this culture and experience. Without it I basically feel like I am walking around with a blindfold on.
I think I am going to call it a night. I have a couple stories and topics I want to touch on, but I will save that for tomorrow as I am pretty much falling asleep on my computer as we speak. =) Goodnight World
Nice to hear from you!!
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